We tried to play nice, Tim Hortons. But you told me and my friend (in very nice PR-speak) to get stuffed. So we have no alternative but to call you on your environmentally destructive marketing campaign. To counter #RollUpTheRim, we offer the following hashtag: #RollDownTheGarbage

Me and my work buddy go to Tim Hortons pretty much every morning. It’s the only coffee shop in walking distance from our workplace. Because we have our own cups, they give us a nickel off. I suppose it’s meant to encourage our environmentally friendly gesture. But this is roll-up-the-rim season; so along with our coffee, they offer us an empty paper cup, free of charge. So we can roll up the rim and then, five times out of six, throw the unused cup away. Or, one time out of six, use the piece of garbage to claim our prize.

Multiply our empty cups by the thousands of other coffee purchases made by Timmy’s customers with reusable cups, and that’s a pretty big mountain of completely unnecessary garbage. Clearly, we thought, the higher-ups of the Tim Hortons Inc. Empire had not thought through all the implications of the marketing campaign.

So my work buddy sent the corporation a helpful suggestion. She told them that they should simply offer a little scratch card or the like to customers like us. That way we wouldn’t have to throw away a whole unused cup to participate in the contest.

She received a canned email response telling her that Tim Hortons “appreciated” her “feedback” but that scratch cards would actually increase paper usage. That’s because cups have to be printed anyway. They are “double purpose” and therefore environmentally friendly. The point that such cups are only “double purpose” for customers who actually use them was simply ignored.

We tried to play nice, Tim Hortons. But you told me and my friend (in very nice PR-speak) to get stuffed. So we have no alternative but to call you on your environmentally destructive marketing campaign. To counter #RollUpTheRim, we offer the following hashtag: #RollDownTheGarbage

The Tim Hortons brand is “middle Canada.” Politicians go there for photo-ops with ordinary folks. They sponsor hockey and day camps and whatnot. They even served coffee and donuts to Canadian troops at their Kandahar base.

And perhaps the environmental destruction of Tim Hortons roll-up-the-rim campaign says something about middle Canada’s dark side. “Don’t think about all that garbage,” says Tim to the Hockey Mom. “Just think about how nice it would be to win a new car!”

It’s kind of like Stephen Harper’s political marketing campaign. He muzzles climate scientists as he appeals to middle Canada, promising economic growth. He’s turning our country into a climate-change-driving Tar Sands pumping station. And we are just supposed to go with the XL Pipeline flow and keep driving our SUVs.

It’s time we realize that the cup is not half full. It’s empty. And it’s garbage.

David Bernans is a Québec-based writer and translator. He is the author of Collateral Murder. Follow him on twitter @dbernans.